Although X-ray and UV absorption by AGN outflows has been known for some time, the kinematics, location, and physical conditions of the absorber have been relatively unexplored. High-resolution X-ray spectra obtained with the grating spectrometers on board XMM-Newton and Chandra have opened new avenues for exploring these outflows. We present methods for constraining some of the relevant physical parameters and apply them to a few interesting sources. Particularly interesting are the estimates of the velocities and mass outflow rates in these winds. We show how measuring outflow velocities may be more difficult than some may have perceived. As for the mass, in some cases, the outflow rate appears to be more massive than the accretion flow; a situation we have called the splattering blender.